Take Your Time Back

So, I’ve gottah be honest with you. This week I have been feeling really..... fatigued. Do you ever get ‘people fatigued’ ? Like you just are craving some alone time, and quiet time? I am a pretty big introvert, and I need A LOT of those things. Solitude and Quiet.

Multiple things have come up in the past month. Some I planned, and some that were completely unavoidable. But all of them left me with very little alone time. Bottom line, it just zapped my energy. 

Covid complicated things too—TWICE in the past month. Once, a Covid scare at day care kept my little guy home for a few days out of an abundance of precaution. The second time my littlest was the one to GET the cold, and that kept him home for the entire week away from day care—which complicated matters even more. (He’s doing better, and we did get him tested….but it wasn’t Covid, thank God!!). I try to be grateful for those things for sure. But dang…..it is so hard working and being a mom to a 2 year old at the same time---all from home! I am sure so many of you know this. The last year and a half have been anything BUT easy for parents. 

So, I decided to just be transparent about how I am feeling in this moment, and that is TIRED.

I feel like so many people feel such a need to keep going, keep up with the HUSTLE, the GRIND….to just keep going, and going, and GOING. I fall into that too sometimes. 

That said, I decided to give myself a break today. It has been really nice. I put no pressure on myself to clean anything. No pressure to get anything done. I woke up and just went with what felt good (as much as is possible in the middle of a pandemic with two kids). 

I sat around and drank coffee this morning. Later, I felt like going out and looking at fall flowers, and my husband agreed to stay home with the kids. I really love decorating, and I thought just lazily poking around to get some fall décor for my porch would feel relaxing and perk my mood up a bit.

So, I did. I poked around a couple flower shops, got some mums, pumpkins, and gourds to put on my porch. I stopped at a farm stand and picked up some fudge, fresh baked cinnamon raisin bread (it smelled sooooo good and it was still warm!!!), apple cider, apples, and got some fresh picked vegetables for the week.  

I came home and decorated my porch, put my stuff away, and made a fall salad with some of the things I had picked up.  I threw some apples, nuts, goat cheese, and dried fruit in there. It felt like it fit my early fall afternoon. I sat and ate it with my husband by a fire outside, while my little guy took a nap and my oldest was entertained by some screen time (yes, sometimes we let screens babysit for a little while too).

It felt so quiet out there with just the two of us. We don’t get a lot of that anymore, but it was nice to steal a few minutes away.

I am now feeling a bit more rejuvenated, and I wanted to share that with you.  Just being alone looking at all the pretty colors of the flowers, and admiring the fall colors of the pumpkins and gourds. It made me feel connected to fall, and the peace of the moment.  I love my little farm stand stores we have in Maine too. They always smell so good going in there this time of year. They always have something seasonal baking, and it fills the whole shop with heavenly smells of cinnamon, pumpkin, and spice!

Sometimes, it is just important to let the day take you where it wants to go. I love waking up without any plan at all. Just seeing how I feel that day, and going wherever the wind wants to take me. Today, it was poking around flower shops, decorating, and taking in the season of fall.

I don’t get as much time to do things like that as I would like. I am much more busy these days than I was years ago.  I do think that no matter how busy we are, it is really important to allow your body to do what it feels it wants to do. I really feel like it is NECESSARY for happiness. It is not a luxury, it is NECESSARY to help you feel good inside. If you are always pushing yourself to DO, DO, DO and GO, GO, GO….then you will really burn out. 

I used to be queen of pushing myself too hard, burning out, and then doing it all over again.  I started to think, what’s the point in that? I am so freakin’ miserable when I do that to myself.

Sometimes I don’t really have a choice. My kids need me, I have a business, and responsibilities, just like you. Sometimes life gets a little crazy. 

I am just urging you to find the time to breathe. Do something for you, ANYTHING for you that you think sounds like it would scratch that itch that will make you feel happy and connected with yourself again. It doesn't have to be one of my kind of things, just do one of YOUR kind of things. It will leave you feeling recharged, and like you can conquer the world tomorrow—after some apple cider and fall baked goods. **wink**.

I’m feeling a little more recharged now. 

Until next time, have fun learning about all the amazing and wonderful parts of you.

Shelby